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An open letter to the one I love…

Date: 17 March 2017

I hate to bother you with this issue but I lack the relationship experience to properly understand what is going on right now. We went to 'I miss you' 'I love you' every two minutes to a single word reply.  From telling each other everything to awkward conversations. Idk if you have been waiting for me to tell you this or not, but I waited more than three months for you to tell me what's going on with you. I never ask you what's wrong because I always wait for you to tell me but probably what you don't understand is that what is bothering you affects both of us. I'm not sure if this happens in other relationships if they really care for each other. But I do care about you, your feelings and everything. I really hate that you seem not to notice that I have changed with you because I keep trying to find something in you but instead of that it seems that I'm losing you, us. Every night when I pray for you I keep asking God to help to find a way to help you but I just don't find a way. The only thing that makes a bit of sense for me is that I need to give you a break so beautiful things can happen to you; you know that's what authors say in their books 'when you love someone let them go, distance yourself so beautiful things can happen to them' maybe you really need a break from to put yourself first and don't think about hurting me and think more on what is lacking on you to be you again or a better you. Now I agree with you I hate 2017.  I know that since my STUPID joke things changed.

Deep down, I know you love me but I’m worried about you and how it seems I can't be the one to help you right now, maybe you just need time to focus on yourself and uni right now; and not on 'I have to text her' or telling me that you feel sorry because we barely talk. No matter what you have to say after this, I love you, you made me believe I deserve one of those book characters guys I read and love could be for me, I know you are the best thing that happened to me. This has been coming for a while. We both know some things have changed over the past few months. Maybe we tried to look past it, hoping things would get better. But things can't change unless we do something about it. I hope we get the need to appreciate each other and what we have as it should be. I don't want the negativity to take control of what we have because I really think it's special. Because literally my love I would do anything you asked me for and maybe you think that those are just cheesy and blah to get you but no, I'm always waiting for you to tell me what you want from me and I'll try my best to make it happen. I always cherish what we’ve shared and I look forward to accomplishing more. But maybe, for now, we need to say until next time.

Please know that I'm really here for you for the bad and good if you need somehow in the middle of this you going to find a way to tell me. Believe me when I say that I want to know every single detail about you.